Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Welcome!
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Welcome, everyone, to our pilgrimage in Puja for January.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I'm so glad that you're here.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): We'll take a moment while folks are coming in, and as we're grounding into this moment.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): to… Maybe grab an…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): an object, or something that brings you joy. So something that, sparks your creativity or brings you joy. And this could be anything, like, if you're out traveling or, you know, on the road, then maybe you're just grabbing, like, a pen out of your bag or backpack.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): If you are at home.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): maybe you're grabbing a journal, or if you have a particular object, like an object of beauty, or something that you love, like, for me, the little dia holder is something that I always really love.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah, so… welcome.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And,
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And we'll get started in just a moment.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yay, you have your turn already. Awesome. Okay, great.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Wonderful. So… If you've got your…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Object, or visualization of your object.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): We're at a time near the end of January that is often celebrated in kind of yogic contexts as Saraswati Punja, or Vasant Pachami, which is, like, a celebration of
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Learning, and knowledge, and also of creativity, and that which sparks your, your creative expression.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So, I thought we could start with something…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Just kind of playful and off-screen for a moment, which is a couple options here.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So… You can take your journal, and if you'd like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): This is a… this is actually a Pratyahara exercise, so I'll just drop to my…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): pen. Let me grab a different pen. So you could stare at your object, right? So not looking at the screen, but, this is a focus practice. So looking at your object, and then first thought, best thought, it doesn't have to be beautiful or perfect or accurate, but draw.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): your object, right? And if you're somewhere where you can't do this, you can always do this later. Invitation to…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Just do a little, you know, kind of, off-screen, off-device, but co-created… activity of…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): focus, right? So you're, like, focusing your attention. Another option would be just to stare at it, just, like, do a practice where you're just staring at your object, and for those just joining.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): We're pulling up into our mind's eye, our imagination, or actually in front of us, an object that symbolizes, in this moment.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Creativity, joy, and then we're doing just a one minute, so it'll be a very short focus exercise.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): with that object. So, give me a thumbs up if you've got your object, and you're ready to play with this, and you can use the little reactions, like the hearts or thumbs up on your… on your screen. Okay, great.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Wonderful. So, we will begin.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Whether you're staring… Soft gaze, or drawing.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And we'll start… now.
Audio shared by Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Just an invitation to complete your drawing or your gazing, and jot a few words of what this object or thing that you're symbolizing, what it.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): means…
Audio shared by Susanna Barkataki (She/They): to you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Again, just first thought, best thought, just a few words.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): raised…
Audio shared by Susanna Barkataki (She/They): or sentence.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I'm taking a moment to finish here.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Journaling, you're writing… And…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I spotlight myself, because in a moment I'm going to write on this board, but this way, if you would prefer to see the gallery view, please change your view. Invitation to do that.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Would anyone like to share their object, or what it called up for them? I will just say mine, it's, again, it's not about representation, right? It's, like, about
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): connection. So, my drawing doesn't… it's not, like, a very accurate representation, but it was really…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It felt really meaningful to me to…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): feel the energy of what I later wrote, which is devotion, love, and joy.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So, would anyone like to share? You don't have to share what you actually did, but the process, or any ahas or experiences, just want to invite in your voices out loud or in the chat.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Okay.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): We'll give a little space, people might be writing.
Karen McMillan: And when it messed the quiet, but I'll share.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Please, please, please.
Karen McMillan: I finished writing them. So… When you said something of joy, what came to mind… was…
Karen McMillan: At first, I was only going to look at the box…
Karen McMillan: But then I decided to open the gift…
Karen McMillan: And this is from 8th Generation, which is an Indigenous artist.
Karen McMillan: And the beauty of the box, one could just…
Karen McMillan: Be with, because you can turn it either way, the quality of the box, and then you open it, and this is a gift from my daughter.
Karen McMillan: Because I was like, oh, Christmas, I don't know. And then she had read one of my emails, which was very… and she went to 8th generation and purchased this.
Karen McMillan: So, I'm like, wow.
Karen McMillan: I touched my daughter, so I felt like passing it on.
Karen McMillan: By just sharing it. I've learned in this course with the decolonization to honor our relatives, our Indigenous relatives, and I gotta tell you, the quality. It's like, why am I shopping American?
Karen McMillan: It's just…
Karen McMillan: And then you get with it, and then I'll stop talking… you get information about the nation and the artist… whoops! The nation and the artist. She also got some earrings. So, so much of the layers of the
Karen McMillan: just being able to be in what doesn't move me as much, I call it the hallmark holiday.
Karen McMillan: And being able to take it someplace else and still enjoy it, and then…
Karen McMillan: Have all my sensual enjoyment of it.
Lynn Shuck (she/her): Good, good afternoon. I'm Lynn, and…
Lynn Shuck (she/her): I threw this pot. I took a class and threw pots on a wheel, and I was not very good at it, and it's wonky.
Lynn Shuck (she/her): But as I stared at it, I remembered how much I loved the feeling of wet clay on a wheel, and I love the colors that came out. Exactly! Perfectly imperfect.
Lynn Shuck (she/her): And I haven't spun on… thrown on a wheel in a while, but I also remember the companionship there, so it makes me think I need to…
Lynn Shuck (she/her): Get back to it.
Lynn Shuck (she/her): I don't care that I sucked at it, it was so much fun, and… and I love this face. I love it.
Lynn Shuck (she/her): T.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you so much, Lynn and Karen.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah… Anyone else?
Margaret Graham (she/her): I'm Margaret, I'll share.
Margaret Graham (she/her): At first, I just had a candle holder here, because it said to bring a candle to the meeting. But when you mentioned that it was about creativity and joy, I just… I had to get up and get a piece of my own artwork, because, as I've shared on here before, I do make, censoring pendants.
Margaret Graham (she/her): That are for meditation and mindfulness, and they're curved on both sides with the holes so that you can hold them.
Margaret Graham (she/her): during meditation, and then use it like a mindfulness tool. And when I do yoga asana on the mat, I do place it down as a dristi, so I was like, well, this is, like, the perfect opportunity to bring this out,
Margaret Graham (she/her): And as I was staring at it, I'm staring in the middle of it, which is, like, the space where the fingers meet, which is, like, a transition space to me.
Margaret Graham (she/her): And I was thinking of, like, the eye of the storm finding the calm amidst chaos currently, so…
Margaret Graham (she/her): Thanks.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you, Margaret.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Anyone else?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So our theme for today, and please feel free to raise your hand if you want to jump in. Just needed more time.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Is bhakti. Is love.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Because the…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): beginning of everything, right, that we're doing, and certainly the beginning of what it is to be trauma-informed, and to care, because really, what is it to be trauma-informed, right? It's to care enough about someone else.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): That you want to love them into wholeness.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): To help them see themselves with love.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): to… Be in such deep relationship.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): That you truly see someone else for what they are, and of course yourself for what you are.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And a love of yoga.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so what I…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I was feeling today, I'm taking a class as part of my PhD program, and my teacher
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): you know, I'll share his name with you, because he has a lot of free stuff on YouTube, but I just want to say, most of you would probably find it really boring and dry, and so… but I have so much love for him, and it's like…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It's a kind of love that's a love for him as this…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): translator and consolidator of wisdom and knowledge. I love him because he's also, like, radical and decolonial and anti-caste,
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I'm not sure how anti-patriarchal he is. I think he's pretty… he hasn't named it explicitly. My sense of him is that he is, right? So, just, like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): as I was preparing to come and share about Bhakti, I…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I live in the things that I'm going to share with you. Sometimes it's for, like, weeks before I share it, specific things, and sometimes it's days. This has been, like, growing over a couple weeks.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): But just feeling that love, right? And then at the same time, the love that I have for myself, for being someone who… like, I'm sitting at a very unique juncture…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): In yoga, psychology, yoga philosophy, yoga therapy.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): trauma-informed yoga, where I feel like… and I'm not that young, right? I'm 48, but I'm like this window between worlds, between the traditional, classical, and then the modern, and also between the sort of traditional and the social justice. And so…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): only my whole life, including my huge challenges, past and present, could have prepared me for this. So I'm feeling this immense, like, love for yoga, for my current
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): main teacher for myself, right? It's bhakti. It's bhti, bhakti, bhti, and it can… bhakti can look like ritual. It can look like sitting and, you know, prostration, or touching the earth, or sun salutation, which is… what is a sun salutation? But…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): a devotion to the earth, to the sky, to the sun, right? To the elements.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): But bhakti love can also be attention. It can be what we put our attention on.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And just seeing the…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): in the chat, Jenna says, like, as an ADHD-er, it could almost feel like body doubling, right? Like, everything that you shared, from Karen to Lynn, to Margaret, it's like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): you can feel the love in what you're sharing, in the relationship, and love doesn't mean a thing is perfect, right? Like,
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): like, Lynn, with your pot, Or a vase that you made, like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Of course it's not. None of us are perfect, and we're even more beautiful for our uniqueness, for the ways that we're, you know, whatever it is, like, flawed, or different, or weird.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Stardust, the tree I'm gazing up at is bringing me joy, a centering and grounding home amongst fear. Yes.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so part of why I wanted to bring Bhakti is not to avoid the intensity of what is happening. If we're in the US, which I know many of us are, it is a…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): a really challenging time. If you're in the wider world, which I also know many of us are, you know, there's…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): instability, violence, suppression of free speech in Iran, in… there's violence in murder and genocide in Palestine, continual in Sudan, like, the world…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): is very intense.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Sometimes, in order to keep doing, like, being the light, being the ones that bring the change and the healing and the…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): accompaniment, a lot of what I'm also seeing is, like, that movement into, okay, how do I steward the world we want?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And it's happening, you know, in Minneapolis. Like, all of the accompaniers who are bringing food to folks who can't leave their houses, all of the folks who are accompanying ICE to try to prevent them from doing whatever their point is for being there, you know, disrupt that.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It's almost like… Of course we're afraid. Of course we're overwhelmed and anxious, if you're feeling that way.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): But these yoga practices give us a grounding
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): In what is greater than that fear, so we can continue to do the work of social justice, of care, of tending, whatever is yours to do, right? I named some examples.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And yes, I, you know, we'll get… we can get into talking about specifics, and there may be people here who have concrete things, but I think the biggest thing we can do if we're like, oh, I myself am not an immigrant with tenuous citizenship status, so I can be in a accompanier, is
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Build relationships with your neighbors, build relationships with your community, get to know people so you can help them, you know, and support them now. Not just when ICE comes, which it may or may not, to where you are.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): But there's no harm in beginning to build those networks. Mutual aid and support networks, very local, very, very local.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): But love, bhakti, And I'll give a little context in a moment.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Bhakti, when… and you can try this for yourself, right? There's different love bhakti practices.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): But when we're feeling anxious, or when we're feeling overwhelmed or fearful.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): for me, when I am, if I do a love of bhakti practice, it… it sort of…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): replaces the fear. So I… it doesn't erase it, it's not like the fear is gone, but it's like it surrounds it, kind of like it takes and holds, like, if the fear is this little shoot or seed, the love surrounds it, and then also expands out.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It's like the metaphor of, you know, if you put, like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): A tablespoon of salt in a glass of water.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): it's gonna ruin the water, and we can't drink it anymore. But if you take a tablespoon of salt, and you put it in, like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I'm trying to think of what you would drink that's a really big container, but if you put it in a, like, say, a bathtub full, not that you would want to necessarily drink your bathtub water, but it's okay, right? If you drink a little bit, and you put the salt, a tablespoon of salt in the bathtub.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): you can still drink that water, and it's okay, it's not too salty. So the love is… and the community
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Is, like, that bigger container.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So, in yoga, we've got the four margas, and I'm gonna write them down, the four paths.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And of course, they inter… They intersect.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And just look which way, yeah.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Okay. Go here.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So these are the… The Margos.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Or, like, yogic path.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): If I'm looking here, can you still hear me? Like, when I said yogic paths, or… yeah, it's hard, so I'll make sure I'm looking.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): There's my mic. So you've got yana, yana yoga, which is the path of…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Inquiry, right? Inquiry, truth, curiosity… wisdom…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): You've got Karma yoga, Which is the yoga of action.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): The yoga of, like, Action and service.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): You've got Raja Yoga, which is, like, the whole, kind of, path of the physical, like, let's just call it the eight limbs.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And then you've got Bhakti.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Which is the yoga of love.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And you could argue that all of the yoga tradition over the last Thousands of years.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So, even from, you know, BCE,
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): with the Vedas and the Upanishads, is different forms of expressing these margas, these paths.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And they are not exclusive, right? Some of us may have come in through more of a raja yoga, like a physical practice, but right now be very devoted to learning.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): curiosity, wisdom, right? Knowledge. Some of us may have come in through, karma, through social justice, through action in the world, through yoga as, like, living service, but also be
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): wanting to explore bhakti. So they're all tied together, and you can be, you know, all… you can be on all four margas. They interweave, they inter-ar.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): But what's helpful about this is knowing that you don't have to even do any asana, right? You don't have to be practicing physical asana to be a yoga leader, a yoga teacher, a yoga practitioner.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): You could be living your life through love, through your devotion, through your care, to your family, to your community, and…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): you are… Practice it.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So I want to pause there and just see if there's any questions or comments on this, and then we'll do a little practice.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Also, P.S.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I love being teacher Susanna with a whiteboard. That makes me very happy, and I have very messy writing. I apologize. Let me know if you can actually read this or not. I know now, I moved it back, maybe not. I can use the Zoom whiteboard, but I just feel like it's nice to, like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): physically see the thing going up, you know? Like…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Any comments or questions on the Margas?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So I want to bring in bell hooks.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): who says, love is a verb, love is an action, right? It's not… I love my child.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): you know, It's…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): continual showing up. It's not, I love my community, you know, and therefore, whatever. It's continual showing up, acting, doing.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Or Adrian Marie Brown, right? Like, what we practice shapes the world that we live in, and it doesn't have to be huge, it can be small, it can be little things.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So any… any comments? I'm just looking at your notes in the chat. When focused in the practice, in the moment.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Bhakti also feels louder than the fear or the pain. Yeah.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah, and so it can be… you know, when I've been in the streets in protests, and I've been in spaces where
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): it's heavily militarized, there's police, and I'll do…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): meta practice. I'll do one of the bhakti practices, which is a meta practice.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): For myself, for the other protesters, and even for, you know, the police.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): internally. It doesn't necessarily change what happens, and I've had some good and some challenging experiences in those moments, but it changes what I'm able… my capacity.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Right? To stay, to be present, to be calm, to be grounded.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And I'll also do meta practice in moments where I feel a lot of fear, or a lot of, you know, I don't really particularly like flying. I flew a lot over the summer for this book tour, so, like, when the plane's taking off, or the plane's landing, or if there's turbulence.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Another way to look at this is yoga is a conversation with death, right? With Yama, the Lord of Death, and so…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): In those moments where we feel like many of us, maybe not all, but many of us feel a sort of fear of change, a fear of older age, a fear of sickness, a fear of death, of dying, and what that means, and being separated from all that's dear to us.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): in those moments that I find the fear rising.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): when I can practice, or be… In a state of love.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It also changes my relationship, too.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Impermanence. Old age, sickness, death.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah. Nicole, thank you for sharing. I often feel like my practice and my daily life are disparate things. I appreciate your examples of how you practice and protest and live. You know, also, like, for those of us who are parents.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I feel like when I was… when Kailash, who's now 13, was a baby, a lot of my practice was just, like, nursing or caring, like, you're holding another being, like, a lot of your day, you know? It's… it's almost…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): it can feel, at least for me, it felt kind of overwhelming a lot of the time. And so my practice was…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): doing it… with the awareness of feeling love, right? Even if it's changing diapers, or preparing the baby food.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Not, like, if I'm not doing it with love, I'm failing, not like that. But, like, when I could, turning my energy and my mind to that feeling of… of love underneath all of the things, or love for myself as a caregiver, right? All of it…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Is an opportunity to practice.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Practice this devotion.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And then now, as Kyla was getting older.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It's the love in the letting go.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Right, and knowing when to be there and when to… the love and the giving space,
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): The love and the trust, and then also in the, like, companionship, the companioning.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So many times, you know, it's, like, children, or even, like, children in big bodies, our partners, our friends, like, they just want someone.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): almost, like, metaphorically, to have a hand at their back and be like, it's okay, right? Like, it's okay. You got this, or I got you. And so it's… we're doing that in various ways, all the time. Like, you can think of what your relationships with the people that you're…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): you're connected to. We're essentially companioning each other through. You know, in India, we sometimes say, like, time passed. It's all time passed. It's like…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It doesn't really matter what we do, right? Time is passing, and there's… and so we're… we're companioning each other through this arc of life, whatever we do, or don't do, or accomplish or don't accomplish.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): isn't so much as important as the companionship. Again, another form of bhakti, another form of love.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so I'm sharing bhakti in a much more grounded way, I just wanna…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): kind of foreground that I'm… I, so far, have not shared.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): what most of us think of bhakti is, like, devotion, right? Devotional songs, chanting, devotion to a deity, or to an altar, pilgrimage, all of those things are bhakti, of course, as well. But it doesn't have to be this grand thing, or a ritual thing, or outside of us. It can be
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): you know, the yoga that we're practicing is more where you internalize the thing. Like, yes, you can do the pilgrimage to the place of devotion, or to Mecca, or to the Saraswati, you know, river, the Ganges River.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And… We can do it internally, we don't have to go anywhere.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Okay.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So… any questions or comments before we do a little practice?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Okay.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Hmm… So I think I'll invite you… to… place…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): One hand on your heart, one hand on your belly.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And you can have your camera on or off, whatever feels supportive. And we'll begin with just a little swaying.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Swing left and right, any amount.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And then forward and back.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Seeing if you can… As you move, place that sense of, or give yourself that feeling of accompaniment, like…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): You might say your name, Susanna.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I've got you. I'm with you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And if it feels okay, and it doesn't make you feel uncomfortable, you might say to yourself.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Your name, Susanna. I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): You can try saying that a few times, or if you're somewhere where you can't say it out loud, maybe in your…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Your mind's eye and your heart.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Or whisper, Susanna.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): But your own name, saying to yourself.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And now as you sway, just kind of coming into a rhythm or a sway that feels really natural, really easeful, like, kind of like you're on a vacation, almost like the hand on your back or the hand on your heart or belly is…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Swaying you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Right? Like, really almost lazy or easy.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Not too much effort.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): You might notice a little bit of a inhale, an exhale.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Deeper breaths.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Shallower breaths to seeing what's there.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Now taking your hands together, rubbing them… Generating some heat and light.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And we're gonna place our hands on our body anywhere that feels like it could use some care, and we'll start at the top of the head, once you've generated some heat, giving yourself some love.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Taking your own hands, maybe massaging, depends on what you feel like. I'm wanting, like, a firm… not, like, my fingers massaging into my head, but, like, firm palm and fingers together.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Maybe down the sides of your head, or around your ears.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And… When you complete, perhaps on your face…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Maybe on the back of your neck, just sending yourself some love. My dear head… Skull…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you. I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And if this feels, like, too much, you know, or cheesy or cringey, that's okay, like, let it be that, or you can just be… touch yourself without sending the… saying, I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Maybe my dear eyes. Wow, all the things you see for me.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you, I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): My dear cheeks… Mouth… Thank you for everything you taste and speak.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you, I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): My dear nose… Thank you so much for all of the smells that you allow me to… Experience.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you, I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And then if you'd like, you can rub your hands again.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Generating some heat and some light, and place them, as you're ready, on the front of your throat.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I'm sending thanks. Thank you to my throat. I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Over your ears, and if you'd like, you can give your ears a little massage, or just cup your hands over your ears.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you for all you allow me to hear.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): The energy that vibrates through.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you, I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): The back of your neck, the top of your spine.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you for holding me up.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): For allowing me to see, to turn my head in different directions. Thank you, I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And then down your shoulders and arms, maybe grasping or just touching.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you to my arms, my hands… Thank you, I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And hands on your heart.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Feeling into your heart and your lungs, these organs of the circulatory system, respiratory system.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you, I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Down your body, anywhere that you would like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): feeling… to your… Torso, your back, and if there's any particular organs that you'd like to name, or…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Send thanks to, perhaps, your kidneys.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Pancreas.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Liver…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Organs that we have, but probably we don't think about too often, unless, of course, there's a breakdown, or you're a doctor, or work with anatomy.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you, I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Regenerative organs. Reproductive organs… Thank you, I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Digestive, organs, stomach… Large intestine, small intestine… Thank you, I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And whether we have all these organs, or perhaps they've been removed, sending that care…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): That gratitude to our body.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Whether they're functioning exactly how you'd want them to, or just the way they are, sending love and thanks.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Down through your legs as you're ready.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): to move there.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thighs and knees and calves and feet, toes.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you, I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Now taking some time with any parts of your body, or your body as a whole.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): That you would like to send love to.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): gratitude for…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Your energetic body.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): The parts of you that can't be… Touched.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): We're maybe even seen…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you, I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I'm now calling to mind, to heart.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): as you feel complete with sending yourself love, and perhaps the completeness is just the, oh, my bhakti practice is gonna be looking in the mirror each day and sending myself love, or telling myself out loud, I love you, I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Sending my body love, my heart love.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): We'll call to mind.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): another person… Or place. Could be a group of people.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): could be… Even just your path right now, or direction you're going?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Could be your students… Could be, like, folks in Minnesota, folks in Iran.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I'm sending them… Could also be you, so sending them you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): This being, or beings.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I love you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And if it feels right, I am here from you, for you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I am part of you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I'm with you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I'm grateful for you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): You can stay right here in this meditative space.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Or, if you would like, bring this into an active meditation, pulling up your journal or notebook, and we're going to write a short offering.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And this is a Bhakti practice, an offering that you don't ever have to send, that this is a letter to,
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Has an act of devotion.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So you can write this letter.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): To whoever you were visualizing, or whatever you were visualizing, or you could choose someone else, but your path, your students…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Part of yourself that's keeping on going.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): a community… And in this writing.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It's a writing of Bhakti, and there's just a few constraints.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And I'll drop them in the chat. One paragraph or less, so you don't have to write forever. But no fixing, no, like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): No advice for them, including yourself.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): No promises, right? Just acknowledgement and presence.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So… And if…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): If the, if the constraints feel not helpful, then feel free to skip them. I just find sometimes when I write a love letter, I feel like I over-give, and… and the idea is just to be, just to express being with.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so this is a letter of love.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): that you… Don't ever have to send.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I'll play some music while we're writing. We'll take about 5 minutes.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And then… We'll come back together.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): offering… Does not need to be acted upon.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): You can take it if you would like, and… Place the letter…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): On your altar, or near your body, or later burn it, or… Put it in water.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Whatever you would like to do to ritualize this… Letter of Love.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And know that in love, not everything is meant to be.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Nothing has to be done.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah, it just is.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So I wanted to leave a little bit of time if anyone would like to ask any questions or share how this experience of
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Really just being together in love and centering love.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Has been for you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): There's a little bit of space for us. Probably have time for as many of you as want to share in the chat, and any voices out loud, and…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Particularly inviting in, if you haven't shared yet into the space out loud.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): You're more than welcome to bring your voices forward.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yes, Jenna.
Jena McCutchen: I was… honestly so surprised by how uncomfortable I was sending myself so much love.
Jena McCutchen: I had to…
Jena McCutchen: I was with myself, and then I wasn't, and then I came back, and then I couldn't stand it. Yeah.
Jena McCutchen: That was very interesting.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you for sharing that, Jenna. You are not alone. If you've felt that now or at any time, please maybe share a thumbs or a heart. I've definitely felt that.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And in the bhakti practices.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): you know, there's a particular practice of offering meta, which… what we did was a kind of meta practice. There's formal meta, which I'll share in the chat in a minute, but there's informal, and for some people, formal really works, and for some people, it doesn't, so…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): But traditionally, you go through yourself, a friend or mentor, a stranger, like, neutral person, an enemy, or, like, challenging person, and all beings.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And in some traditions, and this is true for my teacher, Shankaraji.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): You spend, like, a year on yourself.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Because for most of us, it's very hard to receive love.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Because of the world that we're in, because of structural oppression, you know, because of the way we're socialized, particularly as women, or people of color, or, you know, sometimes even, like, being the first child versus the third, or, you know, there's just so many circumstances that lead to it being difficult to accept love.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so we spend a year on ourselves. And if after that year, the teacher is like, well, you could spend another year, you spend another year.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so… I didn't want to give us a formal, because…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): it can jump too quickly, right? To, like… it's almost like we abandon ourselves to be like, I love this person, I love… you know?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so I ended up… my letter was to my… a part of myself.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Because even though I've been doing this for whatever many years, 20, 30-something, like that.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): we can also, even if we've done it and we've gone through the whole cycle, need to come back to offering ourselves love and receiving love. So you are not alone.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And you are not, doing it wrong, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with you if it was hard to receive love. It is an invitation, then, to, you know, like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Offer yourself love if you'd like, more and more and more, try, feel how it feels.
Jena McCutchen: Yeah.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you. I actually wrote in my letter.
Jena McCutchen: exactly that, that I hope that, you know, with practice, the more I come back to give myself love, it will be just easier, and perhaps more time will pass between,
Jena McCutchen: having to… do a practice like this, or just give myself love. Yeah, thank you for sharing that.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah, you're so welcome.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And there is a recording of the meta practices in both Embrace Yoga's Roots and Yoga Class Curator, two different recordings, so if you… if you're like, oh, I really want to listen to you guiding it, you can go in and you'll… you'll find them in there. Yeah.
Jena McCutchen: Thank you, I'll look for those.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Lynn… Okay, wait, I'm… Just looking. Naomi, the letter was so beautiful and incredibly moving.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I agree with Jenna, really hard to send love to myself, too. Yeah.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Karen, I appreciated the practice. It brought me back to my time with an Ayurvedic coach who invited me to say I love you every morning, before I dressed, washed, put on any makeup, hair, while looking in a mirror. I now know it as Bhakti.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Probably because she knew it was hard for some, and practice is love. Yeah.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah, that's a big one, you know?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): We're so much easier to control when we're focused on things like what we look like, or what we don't look like, or… and so, wow, there are a lot of messages around what we should look like or shouldn't look like, and, you know, it's intertwined with so many things, and so it really, truly is so radical.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It's a radical act to love ourselves and to practice that, and so thank you for sharing, Karen.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Lynn…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): when I offered love to Minnesota and to Iran, that was hard. I'm here in Minneapolis. I know it's bad, but receiving that love from you and knowing it is seen on par with Iran, oof.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah, it's really hard. Like, what you're going through is hard, you know? It's… it's like…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): The literal unraveling of…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): the belief we had in democracy, and like… like, for those who were like, yeah, fascism, like, it's just a word, I feel like we're seeing it
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): as a practice. And…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): what is… it's so devastating, and also, I just want to name for folks of color, for Indigenous folks, Black folks, right?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): maybe never had a time without this experience, because it's been like that forever, right? For… for… Yeah, so…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It's sort of like a both-and and many different experiences of it, and…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): The resistance, the people who are accompanying, you know.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): immigrants who are interrupting ICE raids, like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): and by people, I don't just mean white folks, like, it is a lot of white folks, but it's also… I saw this video of an amazing, Somali Uber driver who is, like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): basically roasting the ICE agents yesterday, and it's like, wow! You know, everyone has a part to play in this. And for some of us, it's gonna be, like, through humor, and for some of us, it's gonna be direct action. For some of us, it's through, like, buying groceries for our neighbors who can't leave their houses.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Or driving folks to work, or like, you know, But the…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I don't even want to call it the resistance, I think it's, like, the humanity?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): The love? It really is love.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): that is on display in Minnesota is, like, that is the world that we're building… sorry, in Minneapolis, not Minnesota.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): yeah, I guess in both… in the wider state and then the specific city, it's like… or cities, and the Twin Cities as well, it's like…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): it's so astounding. It's so beautiful, and, like, It's awe-inspiring.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And it's only possible, right, from love, from seeing ourselves in another. And so then, I don't know if you want to say anything. Yeah! For me, the first instance is Philando Castile, and now it's from our federal government.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah Lynn, just inviting your voice in if you would like to say anything.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): But you don't have to.
Lynn Shuck (she/her): No, I… I… I've been aware that it's not… Just because a white person
Lynn Shuck (she/her): was the face of it. I didn't move to Minnesota until, like, 12, 13 years ago, and so Philando Castile is 10 years now.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And that was my first…
Lynn Shuck (she/her): brush with it, and that was our local police. So when friends who aren't here say, well, why isn't your police force helping? I'm like, because this is what they do?
Lynn Shuck (she/her): Yeah. Now they are stepping back and letting the big guys do… like, it's…
Lynn Shuck (she/her): It is a beautiful place to live if you're white.
Lynn Shuck (she/her): And it's always been a hard place to live if you're not.
Lynn Shuck (she/her): And I'm provisionally white. As a Jewish person here, I feel very clearly Jews were only… we only became white in the 1950s.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so I've been much more aware of.
Lynn Shuck (she/her): the privilege of that, because my father stepped into whiteness in the 50s. I'm 60 years old, so I was born in the 60s, but,
Lynn Shuck (she/her): It… it…
Lynn Shuck (she/her): It's been bad here, it's just now the people out in Minnetonka, in their suburbs, see it, and they're finally coming in and going, this is wrong. We're like, duh.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah. But it's…
Lynn Shuck (she/her): I've never seen anything like it. I've never seen anything like it, and I'm sorry that lots and lots of other people have seen this for so long, and I'm glad other people are finally waking up and seeing that this
Lynn Shuck (she/her): Is our government?
Lynn Shuck (she/her): And has been.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah.
Lynn Shuck (she/her): It's just that some of us got to hide for a while.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah.
Lynn Shuck (she/her): Nobody can hide anymore. There's no… anybody who's still hiding is doing it deliberately.
Lynn Shuck (she/her): That's it. So, this bhakti practice is real interesting right now. Thank you, Karen.
Lynn Shuck (she/her): It… the things that I think on a daily basis are so far from love and yoga right now. And I'm embarrassed and ashamed, and then, well, what else do you want me to feel? There's a Blackhawk helicopter flying over my house.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Totally.
Lynn Shuck (she/her): So, that's… that's kind of where we're all at here.
Lynn Shuck (she/her): I'll be quiet now.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you, Lynn. Yeah, and…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): There's… this is a whole other… and maybe we'll pick this up in two weeks in our office hours, but, like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): What does love look like under fascism, right? Can we love? Should we love? How do we love?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): An ICE agent.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Right? Or the police. Do we? What does love look like? Does love look like the fierce sword of, like, a bodhisattva coming in to say, you know, never again? Right? Which is part of the stories.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): there's not one way, and… and so I think I'll… we'll continue with that, but not feeling bad, for sure, if you're not able to find love for oppressors, right? Some… some people are gonna say.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): We should, but that is not… that is not the only way to interpret yoga.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): There are many different ways of expressing love. I also just want to read, I know we're at time, but what Karen said, as someone with a father who lived through Jim Crow, as a boomer, with a father who lived through Jim Crow in the South, while in
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Army, I was saying, oh, SHT, again, then realize it's more about still, right? It's not, yeah, again, it's still. The seeds are a federal government for people of color, from redlining to blockbusting through 2008, 2018.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Right, it is, still. Yeah.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): On IG, a decolonized yoga teacher asked if we should even practice according to Hatta Yoga Pradivika. Yeah. Can you say more, Karen? Maybe in the chat or out loud?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And then…
Karen McMillan: first time I heard that perspective, because I'm only recently introduced to the, Hatha Yoga Pragittaka.
Karen McMillan: but… and I forgot her name, she's very much about decolonized yoga, and she read from the Pradika, saying that we should only practice in places
Karen McMillan: that are of… and I don't remember the words, but basically of people who are practicing within social justice.
Karen McMillan: We shouldn't even be practicing in environments like this.
Karen McMillan: And so I'm like, okay, I went and bought a copy of the Padipka, because now I'm really curious. And so, it sounds like that question, like, please, can we? I'm gonna read, and I'd love to hear more.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Wonderful, yes. I will… I will pick up on this thread when we meet again next. Like, how do we practice? What does love look like under fascism, right? And what are the many ways? There's not just one way. There's… there's many, many ways.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So we'll take a moment to stretch, to pull in…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Love, or to send it out.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And close with Om, Shanti, Shanti, Shanti, Shanti. Om, Shakti, Shakti, Shakti, Shakti. Peace, peace, peace, and power, power, power.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you so much to each of you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So grateful for you, and we'll see you, actually, we do have Trudy LeBron coming to teach us next week. Let me just make sure to give you the exact days. Trudy will be Thursday, February 5th, so next week.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): 9 a.m. Pacific to 10 a.m. Pacific, equity-centered business, so it's, like, taking these things, and how do we then
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): like, share in the world. So, see you for that, and then after that, we'll have my office hours, Wednesday, February 11th. So, see you all soon, and please feel free to unmute and say goodbye.
Naomi Hook: Thank you, thank you so much.
Katherine Sorensen: Thank you. Thank you all. Bye.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you.
Lynn Shuck (she/her): Hi, thank you all.
Noemi (she/her): Thank you, bye.
Margaret Graham (she/her): Susanna.