Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Pilgrimage and Khuta.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So good to be here with you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Hmm… Just lovely to see folks as you… Come in today.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And happy Diwali, for those who celebrate.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): The Festival of Lights, and the triumph of Good Over Evil.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): We're going to explore a practice of brahmatarya today. Brahmatarya is, like, energy management,
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And we'll explore particularly our sacred no and our sacred yes. So, we've done this mudra, some of us, in other contexts, in the most recent issue of Yoga class, Yoga Changemaker magazine.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Which, maybe, Juliana, you could drop in the chat the link to… it's actually…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Actually, you might not know this, but it's cool. Let me pull it up. It's on our new…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): the Ignite Be Well site.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): We've got,
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): We've got a list of all of our free resources, and we're gonna add more things, but just, just in case anyone wants
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): To pull this up. Let me drop it for you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So, I'll… I'll share in a moment, but just as we're coming in and gathering, invitation to share in the chat anything that, you know, I feel like sharing, like, the sacred note sometimes can be a little more vulnerable, so just naming that and honoring that.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): But is there anything that you've been, like, okay, I'm saying no to this, I'm happy to say no to this, it's the right thing for me to say no?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And anything that's feeling like a sacred yes in your life right now. So we'll just take a moment…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I know not such a casual drop-in question, but… I wanna go…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Go deep, and my wishes that we… Connect and experience transformation together.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So, checking in with your heart, with your body, with your gut, anything that is, like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah, I'm not… not gonna do that.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And anything that you're like, oh yeah, actually, I really want to do that, or I've been happy doing this. So, we're reflecting on our sacred no.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And sacred yeses.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And what makes it sacred, right? What makes it sacred, I think, is what we'll explore a little bit today.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Hmm…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Meow.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Just taking a moment just to drop that in the chat.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Nicole says, no to activities that feel like a checkbox.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yes to things that I feel called to on a deeper level. Yeah.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you for that.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Jill, yes to joy, no to others' expectations. Yeah, and if there's anything, you know, and you don't have to put this in the chat, but for yourself, you can. But for yourself, anything that's really concrete. Like, for example.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): today, I'm kind of healing from, like, a digestive imbalance, and I don't know if anyone has ever been through that type of thing, but
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): apparently, at least this experience is taking longer than, you know, it's not like 3 days or a week, it's a longer time, right? So, I have a friend who reached out with a long message, like, can you look at this? I was like, you know what? I actually can't look at this today, because I'm taking care of myself.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And I'm showing up for work things that I love, and that I'm excited about, and that nourish me, and also just naming, because I named that I'm working through an imbalance. If I wasn't able to be here, I would have canceled and let you all know. Like, I'm okay.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I also monitor really closely, and I think this happens with yogic practice.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): my internal state as I'm doing things, and I notice, often, when I'm teaching.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): that I actually get recharged. And I look at biomarkers, like my heart rate, or my breath, right, things that we can just kind of check through
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): touching our own bodies. My pulse, I can take my own Ayurvedic pulse.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So, all of that information goes into our sacred no's, right? And our sacred yeses. Like, what are the things that nourish us? What are the things that deplete us?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And… yeah.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Looking at yours, some things I'm evaluating as to whether they're a no or yes, not there yet, yeah. Letting go of not good enough, taking messy action. And I just want to say with, it took me a while
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): to write that to my friends, because I like to be there for people, you know, in my life. I was like, oh no, and then it was nice, in this case, she understood, right? She wasn't upset or mad, but it isn't about the reaction, necessarily. It's about what's right for us.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Letting go of not good enough, taking messy action, yes to slowing down, no to answering notifications immediately, exactly. Yeah.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And this can be a continued exploration.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So I'm gonna pull up, just as we begin our… we'll move into a practice in just a moment, but I want to show you this.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Mudra.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Nope.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Let me know. Can you see that?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah, okay, great.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So, Abaya Prada Mudra.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And this is the mudra of fearlessness. I also think of it as the… the mudra of that sacred no and the sacred yes.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so, one hand raised.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Up, and then the other hand.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Out and down, right? So one hand up and the other hand down.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And it's an ancient… an ancient symbol of protection, and also strength.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): We often see many different statues, statues of the Buddha, different deities, Hindu, Jain deities doing this.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): This mudra invites us and reminds us that we're safe to be fully ourselves.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It helps anchor in clarity, peace, and power.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And it means fearlessness in Sanskrit.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so, how to…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So, this little picture of me doing it, alright? I'm raising your right hand to your shoulder height with your palm facing outward.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Fingers extended, but also relaxed.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And your left hand can… if you're sitting or standing, you can have it in your lap, or, like, you see me there standing, it can just be down by your side, or your arm can be relaxed, lengthen with your palm facing forward.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Allow your shoulders to soften.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Breathe steadily.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And you can feel the energy of your raised palm pushing away like a shield.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Your heart's steady and open and shaken.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It can create a felt sense of courage, calm, and inner strength.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): You can use it before hard conversations, when facing injustice.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Or when you need to reconnect with your power.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): This is the mudra. I will not shrink.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And you can keep your hands in this mudra now, if you would like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Or, option 2, if you want to try it on the other side, switch your arms, so your other arm, left arm comes up, right hand facing out, you can't really see my right hand, it's awkward for me to have it up, so I'll just bring it down.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And… Letting your gaze soften.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Letting your body… See what it's like to hold… The sacred and powerful no.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And the extended hand… is your sacred yes. The things that you're connecting to.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): That give you life, and that you breathe life into…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Where you want and wish to be of service.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): One more breath here.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And then, your choice, you can switch back, continue like this, or let both hands come down, resting in your lap, and we'll do a little bit of…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): a guided.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): practice.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Hmm…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So in this practice, we're imagining That we're, like, this… Beautiful.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Garden.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Right? Like, your nervous system… Last time we gathered, we explored our nervous systems, As a garden.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so you… if that… feels…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Nourishing and supportive to you, you can call your garden back up and just check in.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): How is it with me?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): How is my garden growing right here, right now, in this moment?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And as we enter… Actually, we're exiting Diwali, the Festival of Lights.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): We're invited to nourish and to protect.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Our inner garden.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Our inner light.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Just like a plant breathes in the sunlight and photosynthesizes it into energy.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): The way the gardener attends… The tenderest little bud, or flower shoot.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): seed.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Or the way you might have, at times, cupped your hand around a candle flame to protect it from the wind.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Feeling… Your body touching the earth.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And imagining… and feeling.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Your breath as soil, softening around your roots.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): With your exhale… Gently tending, pruning…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Releasing whatever's unnecessary, or overgrown, or doesn't serve you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And on your inhale… Whoever is nourishing, life-giving.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Supportive to your nervous system, to your garden.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): to your ecosystem.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): You and beyond you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Breathing that in.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Maybe rest… Laughter… Friendship.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Sacred action, aligned action.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Still miss.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): May I tend the garden of my nervous system with care.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): My sacred, yes.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And sacred no.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It's Brahmacharya, Brahma… Creator.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Charya Chariot. The Chariot of Creation.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It's often misunderstood as repression.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): That might be of sexual desire, or…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Any other kinds of desires, material desires?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And while being aware of these impulses and not controlled by them is, of course, an important part of yoga philosophy.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): in psychology.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Pramacharya is so much deeper.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It's… In its truest form, a kind of ecological balance.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Harmony.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Of all your energy systems.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Your prana, your life force.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And even… Pramacharya is that balance of…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Your unique individual self, the little s self.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): In connection with the big-ass self.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yoga as unity.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And sometimes we might feel that as, like, a little… like a warm glow in our hearts.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): That feeling of alignment, of… I'm on the right path, or that tug in the…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): The direction that is aligned.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): For you, in your unique unfoldment.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Newer flowering.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Towards… the divine.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so we can almost imagine that our energy, our prana.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Is, like, water in a garden.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): If we fill the garden, right, our whole ecosystem, our mind, body, spirit, emotions.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): With so much water, just, like, filling every plant.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): For constantly giving, or doing, or reacting.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It's a lot, a lot of effort, and…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Some of our plants don't like that much water.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): But if we are holding on or gripping too tightly to the energy, to the prana, like the kink in a hose.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Maybe withdrawing or fearful.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Like the garden, we might dry out or wilt a little bit.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so the… Path of brahmacharya in yoga is like that aligned flow.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And your aligned flow is different from everyone else in this circle, this sacred circle.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And it's different from what your flow was a year ago, 10 years ago, even a week ago.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Or what it will be.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so we can visualize, if it's helpful, that brahmatarya might be kind of like the irrigation pathways, the pathways that bring water, but also, just as important, are the drains, the pathways that allow the water to seep away.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And into the environment around us.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): These channels that let life… Thrive.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Imagining that your spine is like this channel of energy, feeling it grow tall, like a young tree reaching up for the light.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Now on your exhale, feeling your roots deepen and connect through your feet, or whatever's touching the earth.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Into the rich soil.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Inhale and open our arms out any amount that you would like to the sides.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Drawing in nourishments.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And if you would like, lifting your arms up over your head.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I'm making a circle around with your arms, and you can make this circle big with your whole arm, or you can have your hands just by your sides, circle your shoulders.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Whatever feels supportive to you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Inhale.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And exhale.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And then, when you're ready, lifting your arms up any amount towards the sky.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Gazing up at your fingers, and then allowing your arms to come down and flow to one side in a gentle twist.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Twisting in one direction, from your belly, your chest, your chin, and then your eyes, if they're not closed, and even if they are, they can twist around last.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): One more breath on this side.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Inhale… Arms rise.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Pulling in that energy once more.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Exhale, release, and twisting to the other side.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Gently, from your belly… Chest, chin.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And eyes twisting around last.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Even if… They're behind your closed lids.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): One more breath here.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Inhale, arms come up once again.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And then exhale, hands come down, fluttering, like maybe you're shaking off any dead leaves or any tension.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Deep breath in, and if you'd like, exhaling through your mouth.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And we'll do Brahma Mudra.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Which is a movement of our head with our breath.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Inhale, it's moving our heads to up and down, exhaling right and then left. So, we'll… I'll guide it, and we'll slow it down. So inhale…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Lifting your head up… Exhale back to center.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Inhale, gazing any amount down towards the earth.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Stretching through the back of your neck.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Back to center.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Inhale to one side.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Exhale, back to center.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Inhale to the other side.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Back to center. Brahma has 4 faces, so we'll do this mudra 4 times.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Moving at your own breath cycle pace.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Head up and center.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Exhaling down and center.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): to one side… Center…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): The other in center… We'll do the next two on your own.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Time, perhaps?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Counting your breath… And if a mantra would be supportive, The mantra, so hum.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Inhale, so… Exhale, hum.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I am that.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Connecting to… The energy within you that is also within everything.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): a power… It is really unnameable, unknowable, immense.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): That runs through all beings.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So, I am not.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): When you complete… Let's practice finding your version.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Of a gentle neck stretch, so… could be circling your neck around…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): All the way, or tilting one direction or the other. Could be lifting up one hand.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And stretching through the side of your neck, maybe letting the other hand go out to the side.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Softening your jaw.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Breathing deeply.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Maybe gazing down, up towards the sky.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And if you're doing a stretch that is on one side, gently transitioning, softly transitioning to the other side, or…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): If you're rotating your head, maybe changing the pace, or the…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Timing, and just hanging out if there's a spot that needs some care.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Relaxing your jaw.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Relaxing your eyes.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I'm gently releasing and finding your way into your resting shape.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Whatever, Shavasana… Can feel like for you today, which can be seated, standing, Lying down.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): As you rest here… Invitation to picture…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Your heart, like a garden at dawn.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): The air is still… The dew sparkles.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): On every leaf.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): At the center of this garden, at your heart.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It's a golden flame.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Your prana.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And around it, you might visualize… A soft… living.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Boundary.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Perhaps trees, or hedges, bushes… Roses.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Conifers, whatever you visualize, as wide and large, or as close in these boundaries of compassion.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And clarity.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And these boundaries, these… Living boundaries. Breathe with you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): In fact, they are part of you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Letting sunlight and all that nourishes you, clean air, flow in.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I'm keeping out anything… That causes disruption, or chaos, or stress.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So you might feel your nervous system downshifting through these practices into more ventral
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Vagal tone. More rest and digest.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Heart cared for… Breath even.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Energy flowing without hurry.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Cultivating equilibrium, the essence of Brahmacharya.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Breathing… with your own… Nourishment.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Then I will…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Give us a few minutes in silence, and then guide us with my voice when it's time.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Breathing in… I'm breathing out.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I'm gently going to shift into a little bit of reflection, journaling, if you would like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So, very slowly, and… easefully…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And you always have the option to stay in this meditative state, and just let my voice kind of wash over, let your…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Imagination and thoughts go where they may.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Or if you would like, you can get your journal, and I'm going to share Some questions for reflection.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): We're going to consider… Our nervous systems… as sacred gardens.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so, how do you tend your nervous system? And if you're like, hey, Suzanne, I really haven't been tending my nervous system, how do you imagine you might tend your nervous system?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So you might start with… I tend my nervous system by…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Or I feel nourished by…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Just allow first thought, best thought. Let your words flow.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And then you can stay with that question.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Or, if you'd like to explore another, I just dropped them in the chat, the first two.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): What parts of my inner garden are feeling overgrown? Where am I saying too many yeses?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Things that don't feel nourishing, that you can perhaps prune away, or maybe…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It's a lot of nourishing things, but…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Still, you want a little more space.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): You can stay there, or move to the next reflection.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): What areas of my garden, of my energy, are underwatered.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Where may I have gone numb, or withdrawn, or…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): said no to life, right? Remembering that, you know, most plants
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Even if we don't water them, when we tend to them, they grow, or they produce seeds that grow new plants.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So it's okay. There's no shame in… what we've…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Not tended.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): You can stay with this reflection.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Or, if you'd like, I have kind of a… two parts.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Mmm…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): what does ventral safety feel like in my body? Like, what are the signs where you know, you're like, oh, I'm in that calm, happy, easy place?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): it's fun, you know, sometimes you can see those signs in others, and everyone's different, but one of the things that I see…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): when I observe my kiddo is he'll, like, skip, you know, he won't just walk or run, he'll, like, have a little extra little hop. I'm like, oh, he feels really happy.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so what are your… Your signs that you're happy.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): That you're joyful.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And sometimes it's easier to notice those in others than in ourselves.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): for me, it's sometimes a soft little smile, and kind of like a cheeky feeling. Like, I feel like, really? Oh my gosh, I get to, like, have this feeling in life? And it's like, yeah, yeah, and it's not with it, like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): big things, like going to Disneyland or something, it's, like, often just sitting outside in the sunlight.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So what does ventral safety feel like in my body?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Or, and or… What boundaries or rituals help my garden flourish?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And I have one yoga teacher
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Who often says this very, like, perplexing thing.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And I'll share it here,
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): What if you can love yourself so much.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): That you don't actually need boundaries.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): That a boundary, the sacred yes and the sacred no, merge.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Right, because you're saying such a sacred yes to yourself.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): That you actually don't have to be like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): You know, of course, a no may be part of it, but it doesn't have to feel…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): like a no. It can feel like a yes.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So, if that resonates, let it. Or if it's something that feels helpful, right? How can I love myself?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So much.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): That I don't need to say, to place boundaries.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Because I'm moving from love.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So, taking just this last minute to… Honor our brahmatarya.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Honoring that light within.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Your light. Everyone's light.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And then if you feel ready…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Releasing your journaling or your reflecting.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And I would love to… invite us into reflection, and I want to just, check in.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): As to if we would like to go into small groups, maybe 2 or 3, or if you want to stay in the larger group. I know sometimes it's really nice, and last time we got to do just a little bit of small group time.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): But it can be really nice to meet other folks, and to say hi where you are in the world, and…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Just, you know, sharing anything that arose from the meditation, anything that you're working with, with brahmacharya, and there is, of course, no shame in, like, oh no, I'm in a time where I'm putting up boundaries, like, great, wonderful. All of that is welcome, just anything that's emerging around these reflections.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Any… my… my intuition is small groups.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): But I also just like to check in and see, like, if there's a bunch of people who are, like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I will just leave. If we go to small groups, then we can stay together.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Any preferences?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Okay, y'all are… you're probably… I know I was… I was intending to try to harmonize and, like, down-regulate our nervous systems for the last…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): 45 minutes, so I hope that that has happened. Yeah, small groups. Okay, cool.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So let me… and then, yeah, if you're not in a space to share, then maybe we'll,
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Why don't we do it like this?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Where you can choose… To go into a breakout room, let's see, let participant choose room.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Create one? No. So I'm gonna create…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Four rooms, so you can choose to go to a room, or you can choose to stay here.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And, so you have that option. So if you're like, hey, I'd love to go talk with a person, and you can join a room, you know, if you…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So the way you do that is there's a little breakout room, three dots, and you can hit that, and then it says breakout rooms, and you can join a room.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And maybe join with someone else. If you see someone, join them. So far, I don't see anyone in a room, but you can let me know if you want me to put you in a room, or Juliana also can help put us in… in rooms.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Or we can hang out together, and just invitation to…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): To share in a… in the chat or out loud,
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Anything that emerged from this practice, or anything, like, as you reflect on?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): these questions… Attending our garden… Boundaries are rituals that help us flourish.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Invitation to share in the chat, if you would like, or out loud.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah, Nicole, thank you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): journaling questions and the way they invited spaciousness. Asking ourselves open-ended questions, you know, it's so beautiful.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I really… that was something I had to learn, and to me, is part of a trauma-informed practice. It's like the way that yoga moves out into the world as a way of life.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): is… instead of being like, oh, wasn't that fun? How great was that? It's like, how was that for you?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And I… and as starting with myself, right? Like, not shoulding the people, I don't know who invented that, but the, like, shoulding on ourselves, like, you should feel this way. I think we do that to ourselves so much, and sometimes to others.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So, practicing satya Brahmacharya, too.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Anyone want to share? Yeah, hi, Maggie.
Maggie Runyon, Your BIRTH Partners: Hi, Susanna. I just wanted to, share how much I love the prompt and the idea of looking at it as a garden, and thinking about that. I know we've talked in other sessions about how, like, the regulation, dysregulation, verbiage can sometimes feel a little…
Maggie Runyon, Your BIRTH Partners: constricting, and I just… I really like this idea of thinking about our nervous system this way, and talking about it when I speak with others, and thinking about how maybe this can feel just more open in the interpretation.
Maggie Runyon, Your BIRTH Partners: Across all pieces, so thank you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you, Maggie.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah, it's a really wonderful time of year, too, just to take the practice of brahmacharya, especially for many of us in the Northern Hemisphere, the change of season, it's getting darker earlier, days are getting shorter, we're moving into winter.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): you know, it's a time where we have these festivities, these holidays, like Diwali, like, you know, we'll be in Hanukkah, there's many, many across so many different cultures, you know, Christmas will come, and…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): From a yoga perspective, All of those are, like, opportunities to internalize the light.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): They're… because yoga is that internalization of ritual, the taking… you know, we can do the outer rituals and find a lot of joy in them, but from a yogic perspective and place and practice.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): It's the meditations like the one that we did, where we slow down, where, you know, and that's watering all the seeds in our gardens.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Amanda, I love what you shared. I liked visualizing boundaries as living walls, like a rose hedge. It really resonated with me more than times I visualized them, like the rigid walls of a fence or fortress. Yeah.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I enjoyed that, too.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I have to be honest, I think I sort of struggle with boundaries sometimes, like, that… and still, definitely for a lot of my life.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I have, and then in more recent years, some have been easier to set, but some are hard, you know, and… and…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I don't want to disappoint people, I want to…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): please people, all of those things, perhaps social conditioning, or just my nature, who knows? And…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so brahmacharya has not been an easy practice for me, but it's been a very impactful one. Like, really impactful, even to the point where
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): you know, like, some hard stuff, right? Like, having to let go of friends, like those friends that, when I really checked in.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And for a period of time, I would, like, go through my life, and then, come home.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): like, have an experience, come home, and, like, journal, and use color to kind of go, like, illustrate the experience, like, how I felt. Jagged, or smooth, or, you know, whatever, so I could just let it flow. And I started to notice there were friends.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): That maybe weren't so nourishing.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Like, maybe there was a kind of…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Like, a kind of taking happening more and more and more in that relationship from… it felt like, from them to me, and…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So over the past few years, it was, like, letting… letting… not, like, cutting off, necessarily, although that's fine, if that's what is supportive, but in my life, it was just sort of watering that friendship less.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And the ones that felt nourishing more.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And, not to say that also, right, I don't mean I turn away from conflict. Like, some of my closest friends I've had immense conflict with.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And I've learned a lot. So it's not just that it's easy, it's looking at kind of how, like, it's nourishing and nourishing me and us, and then allowing conflict as well to, to let the relationship deepen.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): That's a big part of yogic philosophy as well.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Anyone else?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Any questions, too? Like, it doesn't have to be about this practice we have.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Just a few more minutes. I'll do a little closing, but any questions or anything that you're going to be taking away with you today?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Like, ahas, or takeaways, or little practices.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah, Nicole, hi.
Nichole BPN (she/her): One thing that I've been thinking about a lot, is…
Nichole BPN (she/her): How we live in a time where people often weaponize boundaries.
Nichole BPN (she/her): And so I guess that's one thing I… I don't know particularly what the question is, but I… how do you… I guess, how do you practice brahmacharya and make sure that it is more of a nourishing kind of gardening thing?
Nichole BPN (she/her): But sometimes your garden… what your garden needs is going to be in conflict with what, like, larger society needs, or the communities around you need. And so, how can we do that in a loving, kind way?
Nichole BPN (she/her): Versus a more, you know, Stonehenge way.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Oh, I love it. It's interesting, when you said weaponizing boundaries, I was thinking of something else.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): You know, ultimately.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): all we can do is try, right? Like, it's like, do our best to communicate as lovingly and clearly as possible, but at the end of the day, we're not responsible
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): as long as we're not harming other people, right? If we're just taking care of ourselves, and that's what those boundaries are. We're not responsible for other people's reactions to that.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): To our self-love.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): even if someone else calls our self-love a weaponization, right? If it's like, oh, I really need rest, I can't come to your event or your party, oh, I really want you to be…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I love you, right? I love you, I want to connect with you, but I can't… I can't come to a party right now. My energy's just not… I'm not available for that.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And I think using that language of, this is what I'm available for, this is what I'm not available for.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Right? Can kind of make it almost depersonalize, is it? It's a little bit more, like, practical, and it's not about them.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And so I don't know if I fully answered your question. The direction I went is, like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): the weaponization of boundaries when we have, like, competing value claims, right, of two different, say, oppressed or marginalized groups. Like, for example,
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): like… Access…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I'm just thinking of a very simple yoga room example, and Celine, I'll come to you in one sec, but someone who's in perimenopause and really needs the air conditioning on, and is super hot, and then someone else who's, you know, maybe got, like, a chronic autoimmune
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): issue, and it runs very cold, and cannot have… does not, you know, it, like, causes a bunch of discomfort and inflammation and problems if the nerve… if the, the air conditioning is on, right? So two competing
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): needs, both very real and very valid. And a boundary could be, like, I can't be here if we don't have the AC on. I can't be here if the AC, right? Like, there… and so in those moments, and again, this is, like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Perhaps a light example, perhaps for some people, not a light example, because you've been in this moment or this experience.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): But is there a way where we can figure it out? Like, I had this happen at a…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And I'm running hot right now, because I'm in perimenopause at a… when I was teaching, I'm also hot, you know, in a room, because I'm teaching, and…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): we… I think what we did was we… instead of had the AC on, yeah, we opened a window near the front of the room.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And then the people who wanted to be cooler or warmer could be at a different section of the room with blankets, right? So we were able to figure it out. It can't always be figured out.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): But I think the thing underneath what you're asking is, like.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Instead of, like, the boundary as the wall.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): I can't be here if, right? It's like, well, I'm experiencing this, I have this need, right? I'm available to be here if these things, can we figure this out? And I don't know if that's helpful, Nicole, but…
Nichole BPN (she/her): Yeah, that last part especially is, I think, exactly what we need more of, and that I was wondering, like, how do we get there? So, thank you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Oh, nice, thank you for dropping that, Juliana. Celine, coming to you.
Selene Kumin Vega (she/her): I was just gonna speak to some actual boundaries. We've just, we've just built a deer fence around an area that we want to be able to grow a vegetable garden in.
Selene Kumin Vega (she/her): And there's no way we could do that, because the deer would have really come in and eaten everything. And today, looking out this window here, I saw two deer wandering through, and…
Selene Kumin Vega (she/her): having a fine time eating ferns that are fine for us to offer them to eat, you know? And that I can have that boundary around the space that I need, and it doesn't mean that I'm cutting off access to them for other things that they can eat.
Selene Kumin Vega (she/her): In other words, it's, like, not like I'm trying to hoard everything in taking care of myself. I'm just saying, this space around me
Selene Kumin Vega (she/her): I need to have for me.
Selene Kumin Vega (she/her): And there's lots of other space out there, too, and I'm not ticking at all.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah, I love that. Thank you so much for sharing that, and I love that we can see the beautiful space outside, and imagine the deer wandering by eating the appropriate fern meal.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Yeah, you know…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): it's also an invitation to be like, well, where do our boundaries, like, that living boundary, where do they begin and end, right? How can we co-exist
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): with our family members, our work mates, our friends, the communities that we're in relationship with, right? Mutual aid, networks.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): again, turning, perhaps, the flip side of boundary to love, right? How are we loving ourselves through our relationships at work, or in mutual aid networks, or in, you know, activist spaces, or yoga spaces?
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): So we'll close with that. Thank you so much for being here. Just really appreciate each of you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And… an invitation…
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Let me just look at what I'm gonna see next. Yeah, oh, okay, yeah. An invitation to… to remember that we have, for trauma-informed yoga and social justice, the Practice and Poetry Dam.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): In a couple weeks? Like, 3 weeks, I think? On Thursday, November 6th. I believe that's the next time I'll see most of you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And then office hours the week after that, and you don't need to be prepared, you can just bring poetry you love, or practice you love, or riff on something you're exploring. So, thank you very, very much, and invitation to take a breath in.
Nichole BPN (she/her): A.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): And unmute and say goodbye! That's perfect.
Amie Connor: Thank you. Have a good day, everyone.
Selene Kumin Vega (she/her): Good to be here.
Selene Kumin Vega (she/her): Thank you. Thanks, Susanna.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thank you.
Karen O'Lone: space.
melinda (they/them): Thank you.
Susanna Barkataki (She/They): Thanks, y'all.